not that good

now, it’s been a new year.. everyone needs a momentum to do something great.. and it’s a great momentum.. new year, new resolution, new target, and new yourself..

and just 4 days from the 1st day of this year.. it is a tough year (4 days) for me.. well, for the first four days, i feel exhausted and i assume that it’s not a good way to start this year.. i mean.. the first step is the hardest isn’t it? yeah, but still.. since i have a bad start.. i kinda pessimistic about this year..

if i’ve fucked up the early first day, how much probability that i didn’t fucked up the rest of this year.. a lot of stuff echoing in my mind, draining my energy.. and i’m unstable..

well, since the probability is just a number, there’s still a chance (high chance perhaps) that this year will be a good year.. or maybe i will find my momentum after my birthday, or after something good happened in my life, or maybe after i passed my darkest moment (again).. nobody knows it..

but still, i keep my finger crossed for this year.. hope that i didn’t messed up this year.. well, that’s my hope, for now..

let’s see a couple weeks from now, is it getting better or worse..